Wang-Holder

October 6th, 2007 No Comments

Today is the day of the world famous Wang-Holder Wedding in San Francisco. Additionally, it’s also Fleet Week, where the “glamorization of war machines” celebrates the mighty men and women who stand on the wall of freedom so you and I can sleep at night. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to attend any of these wonderful events this weekend. The good news is that the Blue Angels are still allowed in Baghdad by the Bay.

Just wait until Captain Planet puts this on his list of “Carbon Footprint” tragedies and flies his private jet across the country trying to drum up support for a green military. If that happens, he and the rest of the hippies can BLOW IT OUT YOUR PIE HOLES!

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I previously reported that we received a Nigerian Scam letter. I’m glad to see thisYahoo! News story about a huge crackdown in the Netherlands, and no, I’m not talking about the red light district.

God knows that I’ve tried to bait some of these bastards into sending me a “good faith” deposit so they can “cover advance fees,” but none of them are biting. Until they do, they can BLOW IT OUT THEIR PIE HOLE!

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As I was walking to the train station this morning, I thought about how hard it really is to be a blogger. Especially now, with my car still in the shop, I’m not listening to the news during the commute, not finding out about someone’s finger in the soup and what have you that is happening in the world.

I walk under the walnut trees, with their sickeningly sweet walnut fruits rotting under them, trying to come up with something exciting to write, incorporating the walnut allergy I have. I try, and come up with nothing.

I just spend the weekend in Phoenix. I flew in, and arrived at the hotel just after 11:00 am on Friday morning. It was “downtown.” Between Central Station and Chase Field. I was struck by how empty the streets were. Empty. Bare. The streets in our city are more crowded at 2:00 am than the streets of Phoenix at high noon. Maybe it was the fact that there were no Diamondback games, basketball season hasn’t yet started, there was no hockey, and there was no football for another two days. Maybe. Maybe no one wants to go outside in the hot summer sun. Don’t know, but it was sure good to come home.

I think about the pennies, discarded on the streets that I stoop to pick up. Each penny is a month’s worth of interest on a dollar. Well, depending on your rate, it might be a month’s interest on $4. Old Ben Franklin said, “A penny saved is a penny earned.” Old Ben Kenobi said, “This was your father’s light sabre.” I say, “A penny found is a penny earned tax free.”

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Boost My Alexa Ranking

September 23rd, 2007 3 Comments

As I write this, my Alexa ranking is 4,426,952, according to the Alexa tool bar. I tried to sign up for a reviewing site, where we review a site and get a couple of dollars for it. Our Alexa rank isn’t high enough for them. I found Dosh Dosh’s 20 quick ways to increase your Alexa rank. We’re going to increase our Alexa ranking, one way or another. I have installed the Alexa toolbar so I can check it each and every minute of my life. I’m not sure it will be quite an obsession, but it will be interesting to watch it grow. Hopefully.

I’ve also changed the site around a little. Previously, I had a square ad on the first three posts on the main page and “In the News” on the third one down. I’m sure you all noticed that. On a single post page, the ad was there and the “In The News” block was there for some reason. Anyway, I have taken the ads off of the posts on the front page, and now feature the Adsense Injector on non-front page postings. I also removed the Amazon context ads and the other ad network. I figure that since each ad network has a minimum payout, and I’ve been waiting 3 years since my last adsense payout of about $20, I figure I’d better keep up on the adsense network and finally get a payout.

I also went into the wordpress control panel and changed my blog url to http://redirect.alexa.com/redirect?blowitoutyourpiehole.com
so that every link goes through the alexa network. I have that link on my Viral Tags page, so hopefully it will get linked through from the Viral Tag Network, and from anyone stumbling here will click on one internal link and help boost the rank.

As we try some other things, we’ll report here how things progress. We also have the Alexa widget installed, but it’s showing a page ranking of 4,422,055 as of this writing. Strange. The Alexa page for Blow It Out Your Pie Hole also shows a very old picture, even though I have requested the robot to update the screen shot months ago. Strange.

Anyway, stay tuned as I try things, tweak things, and see what confusions or clarifications I can find.

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A Story

September 13th, 2007 1 Comment

Way, way, back in late 1988/early 1989, I saw Stripes. In March 1989 I decided that I needed a haircut, so I joined the Army Reserve. Having just seen Stripes, I figured I’d get a free haircut during entry into Basic Training. It actually cost me $4.25. Anyway I went to Basic Training and got buffed. As a side note, from the time I was in 6th grade to the time I entered Basic Training, I was within 5 pounds of 150 pounds. I came out super muscled out at 175.

Anyway, I journeyed off to Fort Gordon the next summer to learn to be a telephone lineman. First set of training is learning to climb a telephone pole. I got the “climb up” part perfected, but the “climb down” I had a little trouble with. I fell off the pole, from the top. The medical guys in the little M*A*S*H* jeep were laughing as I hobbled over to them for removal of an inch long splinter. They were digging and pulling and digging and pulling, and finally managed to extricate the timber from my leg. There was another plank embedded in my shin right next to that one, and when they asked if there was anything else they could do, I declined. The hunk of wood finally came out of my leg when we were at the Augusta Mall after having seen Die Hard 2, but I digress. Actually this whole story is a digression, but again, I digress.

Anyway, after the medical procedure, which by the way was without the benefit of anesthesia, the sergeant, who had more stripes on his arm than I did, and he said, “Get up there and do it again.” So I did. This time, the fall was a bit more serious. The hospital diagnosed it as “a bad sprain.” I guess that it’s opposed to a “good sprain.” Anyway, the next day my ankle swelled up and it looked like James Caan’s legs in Misery, so I went back to the Hospital.

The Army logic was “If we had the X-Ray moved over just a little bit, we would have seen the fracture.” My talus was broken. By that time, my ankle had swelled up so much, that they couldn’t put a cast on it, because my ankle, in theory, would shrink and the cast would fall off, and my ankle wouldn’t set correctly. Wouldn’t you know it, even with the physical therapy, my ankle never made it back to 100%. It aches when the weather changes, and aches when I have a lot of walking to do.

Why am I telling this story? The clutch went out on the car. It’s gone. Non existent. Kaput. I’ve been taking the train to work each day. It’s a 17 minute walk to the train, and an 18 minute walk to the grind. My ankle is killing me, I we can’t afford a new clutch. Can’t afford a new car, either.

In related news, I have signed up for a bunch of affilliate links, so stay tuned for the new Pie Hole Shopping Mall and Referral Center, coming soon! Maybe I can do something with all these domains that I have just lying around, with plans and plans that I don’t seem to have time for. Arrgh, it’s tough in the life of blowing it out your pie hole.

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It is written today: FOXNews.com - Air Force Mistakenly Flies 5 Nuclear Warheads Over U.S. “Five nuclear warheads were mistakenly loaded onto a B-52 bomber and flown between North Dakota and Louisiana, a senior defense official told FOX News.” Sure. That’s what they want you to believe. What you really need to do is read between the lines.

First, they announce that nuclear warheads were moved to Louisiana. Obviously, one of them is to replace the nuke that they used to blow up the levees when hurricane Katrina hit, just two years ago. But they claim that it is a big mistake, so they will have a big hoopdy-doo about sending them back, planning out the train route, publishing it in the newspapers so communists can go to the train tracks and protest the Free Market and global warming and whatever else commies are protesting. Captain Planet is no doubt to make a big stink over it, and it will certainly turn up in one of the next Democrat debates.

Then, all the paperwork will show that the total nuclear weapon arsenal is back the way it was last week, and Louisiana will still have nukes. Then, those nukes are going to be transferred to a secret operation, code named Operation Kill Them Before They Kill Us, and shipped to Iran, where they will either be used to destroy the Islamofacists, or planted to show the world that Iran has nukes and must be stopped at any cost.

Now, first off, it just might work. On the other hand, if you actually believe any of that, you need to BLOW IT OUT YOUR PIE HOLE!

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Caller ID and stupidity

September 4th, 2007 No Comments

So we have moved into a new facility, here at the grind. We got an all new phone system and all new phone numbers. Conceivably, someone else has a new phone number and a phone system. That other person are the people who used to have our number. They call. Apparently, it is some sort of automated system that doesn’t leave a message.

I used to use a system like that in my old job. It would call through the list, and if it wasn’t answered by a human, it would hang up and go on to the next number. Once it finished, it would cycle through again, leaving a message if someone didn’t answer the second time. As a side bar to this side bar, I would type in the phone numbers as given to me to schedule a delivery of a hot tub. The numbers were probably hand written, faxed a couple of times, then entered into the system. Very often, numbers were wrong or transposed. Anyway, some old guy called me and demanded that I remove his number because he didn’t order a hot tub. Then, he wouldn’t tell me his number to remove it, and demanded that I remove his number. “What’s your number?” “I’m not telling you. Just take it off your list.” Repeat five times, then he told me that he’d call his attorney. “Go ahead,” I said, “I’ll ask him your phone number, and in the meantime, you’ll keep getting calls.” Genious.

So anyway, we get these calls a couple of times a day. “I saw your number on my caller ID. Who are you and what do you want?”

“We didn’t call you. Is there a message from whoever did?”

“No, I just hit the redial button.”

So now I’m thinking that we should tell them that we wanted a pizza delivered, or a tow truck, but they didn’t answer. These calls are proof positive that Caller ID decreases brain power. I, on the other hand work something like this: “Didn’t leave a message? Wasn’t too important, now, was it.” Someone calls, doesn’t leave a message. Obviously not important. If it’s important, they’ll call back.

Maybe they’re getting called by AlGore who is calling but can only wait 10 seconds because he has a lot of calls to make. “Hi, this is AlGore. My son can do 100 miles per hour in a Prius, but it’s a Prius. It is the same amount of carbon as if your hummer were doing 347 MPH.”

In the mean time, BLOW IT OUT YOUR PIE HOLE!

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It didn’t work. My friends and family thought it wise to stage an intervention. I guess they saw the A&E TV show too many times. Anyway, I’ve had about 6 weeks of Anger Management Therapy, meditation, and relaxation.

Let’s just say that it repressed all the oppobrium is spilling forth. Unfortunately, in my absense I was appointed to a couple of other projects that need to be started and mostly wrapped up in the next 17 days. Yippee!

Let’s just see how long it takes for those projects to have little “blow it out your pie hole” Easter Eggs.

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Right now, on Pelosi’s website, she is proclaiming to the world that there is 5 days, 8 hours, and 36 minutes until the “first minimum wage increase in 10 years.” Right now, the Federal Minimum Wage is $5.15. The only people really making minimum wage are teenagers working at Burger King and food servers, but their paychecks pay all the taxes from their tips. Great, Ms. Pelosi. Where will the extra money come from to pay the burger slingers? From the consumers who buy. It sure as hell isn’t going to come out of the owner’s pocket. The establishment isn’t going to pay the power company less.

“I can’t pay you your full bill this month because I need to pay my employees more.” Right.

“We’ll shut off your power so you can’t make any money this month.” Then, there’s no power taxes collected, no federal wage taxes withheld, state wage taxes withheld, no social security taxes withheld,no sales taxes collected, no telephone taxes collected, no taxes from the carbon dioxide company, no grease company service taxes, no taxes collected during the transportation of the raw meat, vegetables, buns, soda syrup, and no sewer taxes collected.

So the money that will pay for the wage increase will come from the consumers. You and me. Us. Rates for goods and services will follow a minimum rate increase. Because of this, buying power decreases after a minimum wage adjustment. Check to see if McDonald’s Double Cheeseburger remains on the dollar menu in a month. After the minimum wage increases, and rates increase so the owner keeps making the same, so our buying power decreases.

Imagine the minimum wage earners. They’re now making more, but they have more tax dollars withheld. They can’t buy as much, so they go hungry. They can’t apply for food stamps, because now they’re making too much.

The whole thing is an evil hippie conspiracy to keep people down. However, 39 states have minimum wages higher than Federal, so increasing the minimum wage does little across the board. However, the increases keep coming, and my dollar keeps shrinking.

Great, Nancy! BLOW IT OUT YOUR PIE HOLE!

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Don Reisinger writes that Windows should be open source. It will probably never happen, but it’s nice to dream.

Actually, most people and the government agree that Microsoft’s operating system is a monopoly. Monopolies collapse by one of two things: Government Action or Technology. Government action allowed more browsers on the windows box by “detatching” Internet Explorer from the operating system. Great. Whoopie.

Technology is the only real threat to the Microsoft machine. Apple hasn’t made a dent in the business world. Linux hasn’t made a dent in the business world. The home users and computer geeks make a big stink about it, though. What can be done? Thanks for asking.

The Solution to Microsoft and Open Source: The Redmond team puts together a team and a task. Create, compeltely from scratch the next (or the one after that) Windows Operating System. It will be built around security, and 100% compatible with existing versions of Office and open sourced versions of Windows API header files (windows.h). Once this is completed, perfected and scoured for security by a third party security company, it can be released to the world as Windows TNG. Once that’s released, the source code of all prior versions of Windows (except the one that TNG is replacing) is released. Microsoft wouldn’t release it to the Public Domain, but they would probably create their own license.

Get Flocked or BLOW IT OUT YOUR PIE HOLE!

In other news, today I learned from Cragislist that “Big girls can take more punishment.” I also tried to start an arguement, but who can argue with this?

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