So there’s this big stink about the whales who swam up the San Joaquin Delta into the Sacramento River. “We can’t have the whales here, it’s not natural” scream the hippies. Saltwater humpback whales are currently basking in the freshwater Sacramento River. Last time I was up in that area, lots of people were enjoying themselves on the banks of the river.
So. Why are some piehole’s panties in a snip? Why can’t they believe that the whales are just on vacation. Sure, they got hurt by a boat and can’t heal unless they’re in salt water. Who hasn’t gone on vacation and not been near their primary health care provider? Once they’re done vacationing, they’ll go back to the salt water and get healed.
This isn’t the first time that whales have taken a detour up the Sacramento River. The most famous was Humphrey. Humphrey was such a celebrity that a restaurant was named after him. I wonder if any biologist has been smart enough to collect the DNA of any of these whales to see if they’re related or even the same, following the migratory patterns of their ancestors.
Maybe, the whales are trying to evolve. They are currently salt-water animals, maybe they want to become freshwater, then sprout legs and walk on earth with the other land animals. They’re X-Whales. Living, breathing mutants. Why do the hippies who want to push them back in the salt-water want to deny the whales a chance at evolution?
Just possibly, the whales want to see the Sacramento River. Not as a vacation, not as an evolutionary exploration, but maybe the just want to see what is there, and they’re being harrassed by people banging pipes together. Why can’t the people up there just respect the whales’ right to choose? The whales have rights, you know.
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This post was tagged with free choice, hippies, mutants, pie hole, whales.
