Yesterday I allegedly completed another revolution around the sun. Whoopie. Honestly, the sun really completed another revolution around me.
Past birthdays have always sucked. When you’re a kid, it’s your birthday, you go to town for the day jumping around like a little shit who’s had too much coffee with sugar, then go to Chuck E. Cheese, have a bite of pizza, jump on the bouncie things, and skip your nap and create terror throughout the household.
When you’re an adult, it’s just another day. Except for a couple of years ago, when I was a temporary employee contracted to the Contra Costa County department of Child Protective Services. I turned in my time card to the actual employer on the day after my birthday, and they said that my services were no longer required at the county. Sure, they’d find me a new position. I’m still waiting. Nick, if you’re still there, and you ever read this, make sure you send a “hello” to Cucumber Jones.
Two years ago, we had an expired cat on my birthday. “Happy Birthday, Daddy. What happened to kitty?”
So historically, my birthdays have sucked ass. But last night, I received an important announcement. Announcing the first sale at the Barn. So come one, come all to the Barn.

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This post was tagged with birthday, butt plug, cat, chuck e cheese, contra costa county, cucumber jones, dead cat.







